"Fuck You"
by Haricot Jones

Don't come to me
To cure your itch
You beefwitted rancid
Whorebag bitch
'Cause if you do
I'll dig a ditch
And throw your runty
Garbage ass in it!
FUCK YOU!
FUCK YOU!
May gophers gnaw on your tits
And spiders crawl up your ass
I'd rather have some fun
On this side of my gun
And watch them sew
Your arms back on again
YEE HAW!

Holy shit. That's some deep shit there. Beefwitted? Yeah. Garbage ass? Oh yeah. Gophers? Fuck yeah. I feel it. It's real, you know. Raw. Anyway, so I stumbled upon a website that is just chock-full of fantastically terrible teen angst poetry. It's so wonderfully painful that it takes me back to my good ol' angst-filled days of yesterday. And by yesterday I do mean, uh, Tuesday.


Enjoy another...delicious!

"Anthem For The Disrespected"

Fuck off and die you fucking bastard.
Who the fuck do you think I am?
Someone who's here at your convenience?
If this was a test you'd fail the exam.

If you say you're gonna call
then you call.
Don't play games with me.
I never wanna see you again.

Eat shit asshole.
You creepy coward panty stealing fuck-up.
Die die die.
Fuck off and die.
Die Die fuck off and die.

See that one started off okay and then it got a wee bit hate-filled towards the end. Panty stealing? Yeah, not cool. She's right to tell him to fuck off and die. Repeatedly.

These poems inspire me. I think I'll try one now.
Um....let's see....


"Blackness Within This Soul of Emptiness & Pain"

you. your cold eyes staring through
me.
no recognition. i am something
close enough
to dead
for it to be my new unyielding truth.
the despair washes over me
casading sadness overwhelms me
i no longer feel the blood in my veins
i have no pulse
my heart has stopped.
you have stopped it.
with just one languid look.
how can i exist without...you?
YEE HAW! Gopher tits!

Pretty good, huh? I'm switching my major to English. Creative writing? Yes! Poetry? Yes! Candidate for the Writers' Workshop? Hell yes! I'm all over it, yo.